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I Can Sincerely Say I've Tried

by Jake Gussman

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1.
When the Woods Whisper (Album Mix) 04:15
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[Verse 1] When he was young, the world was small[ The people and places seemed so tall Riding home in your car, head out the window and hair on the wind The evening leaves they seemed to call him Through winding streets and neighborhoods He pedaled; he pushed as fast as he could Trusting only tires and steel to hold his weight If he could move fast enough, he’d be safe [Chorus 1] Garages and basements and trees are the most accepting place that a boy will ever see ‘cause the people may scream but the woods only whisper [Verse 2] He heard the crashes in his dreams But he woke up to a louder reality In bed he tried to sew the seams He thought if these sheets could only swallow me In old photos he’d never smile Sometimes he could only be a problem child Behind these walls or off for miles Doesn’t matter sometimes these things just take awhile [Chorus 2] Garages and basements and trees are the most accepting place that a boy will ever see ‘cause the people may scream but the woods only whisper [Bridge] He’s all alone in the forest He wonders if they’ll even notice as the roots let loose that he’s falling down [Chorus 3] Garages and basements and trees are the most accepting place that a boy will ever see ‘cause the people may scream but the woods only whisper The people may scream but the woods only whisper [x3]
2.
Dreaming of You (interlude) 00:59
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3.
The Devil's Friends 02:41
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[Intro] Better days they come and pass. We’ll have to work to make them last It’s worth it all if you’ll smile just once more [Verse 1] The devils friends take turns to beat Her up until she cannot sleep She smiles she smiles he’s gone away The pain comes back another day She asks her god “is this the end” “Should I pack up and leave my friends?” He says the end you’ve yet to meet ‘Cause it’s yourself you can’t defeat [Refrain] Is it time that we leave this all behind? Don’t worry darling; another day comes after night Forget the part of us that eats you up inside Just remember it gets easier with time [Verse 2] Depression comes to hold your hand To stab you before you can stand Oh my darling please believe Your faith and love I cannot see I’ll hold you close and mend your heart And give our love a brand new start The day’s so long, I feel so weak I pray the lord my soul to keep
4.
Love I Shouldn't Feel & Friends I Shouldn't Have 03:36
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[Verse 1] I don’t know you As well as I’d like All I know is things are gonna get a little complicated on the other side Me and my ex, we been hangin’ out How can I tell her there’s someone new that I been thinking about? Met her at a party up in central jersey now she’s coming to another at my good friend’s house Ain’t a thing gonna be alright; gonna get to drunk tonight Probably say something stupid gonna make a damn admission of the insecurities inside [Pre Chorus 1] Friendships are getting harder The distance is feeling farther from you. It’s all because I hold onto [Chorus 1] Love I shouldn’t feel. Friends I shouldn’t have. And time I shouldn’t waste on chances I didn’t have [Verse 2] I asked you out. You said “let’s be friends”. You see for me this was something new You said you were taken but you must be mistaken I won’t listen ‘til I see the proof This was the first thought of dating since the two year relation with the first girl I ever had Stress took us under then we had a crazy summer now the fall has got me feeling bad When it came down to it, it’s the point that I missed, that sometimes you gotta take a step back Let my friend make mistakes let my ex take a break give myself a moment to relax [Pre Chorus 2] I’m losing track of the truth And I really don’t know what to do It’s all because I hold onto [Chorus 1] Love I shouldn’t feel. Friends I shouldn’t have. And time I shouldn’t waste on chances I didn’t haaaave!! [Break down] And I can’t stop thinking of these women like they’re all a chance Like I can’t just relax and have a girl as a friend without thinking about making a pass The truth is I never really saw you as you were cause’ when I get in my head, and I pick at the dead all the lines they begin to blur So maybe I’ll turn to drinking so I can stop thinking My friends are getting high, now they seem a bit different The states separate us like sister from brother It was time for one now it’s time for another and now Nobody’s sober Do we remember each other? And we’re all gonna take it back in the morning
5.
The Procedure 02:13
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As I Wait Alone For you I hear the sounds within I don’t care to listen to I don’t know that you care as I stare There’s something empty And I hear your voice it won’t stop And there’s nothing to do As it rings too true just like The break within you Don’t wanna keep clearing my head Just to Forget You Just to Forget You
6.
The Vestibule (interlude) 00:12
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7.
Already 03:32
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[Verse 1] You stare at me while I sleep At least a gentleman can dream Still the summer tastes so sweet With you two years apart two weeks I feel like myself about once a day But it’s okay That’s what they say I talk to him I talk to her They’re not the same as you were! [Chorus] And she knows what she wants ‘cause she’s already gone I don’t know what I want; it’s probably what I’ve got And I feel self-assured in these words As you’ve heard I don’t feel anything that’s alright I’ll just sing [Verse 2] There’s really no reason not to like you But it can be scary starting something new Maybe I wasn’t ready for the end But I can’t rebound on all my friends I guess life’s a joke and then I’ll choke Upon these words as if you’ve heard That I’ll be down around this town Fighting off the need to see you around! [Chorus] And she knows what she wants ‘cause she’s already gone I don’t know what I want; it’s probably what I’ve got I still care for you dear but your voice I can’t hear In my ear all along ‘cause you already Gooooooone!!!!!!!!! Goooooooone!!!!!! [Break-Down] I didn’t expect to see you with another guy When you told me you needed time you looked me in the eye They said that you lied but it doesn’t feel right I’ll probably be sleeping heavy on this for a month or two of nights. Now she knows what she want but she’s already gone [x4] Goooooooone!!!!!! Goooooooone!!!!!! Goooooooone!!!!!! Goooooooone!!!!!! At least for a week Maybe a few I’ll find something to do
8.
Letting Go (interlude) 00:54
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9.
Dysphoria 04:00
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It’s been seeming to me lately That you don’t know me Any longer I expected you to hate me Because I am slowly getting farther From the person I used to be Who I once was is falling deeper Into the confusion inside me And thinking clearly is getting harder Friction’s building between friends Our birthday candles burn both ends The loneliness is setting in Is it a sin when we turn to our vices to burn it down again? I’m still bursting out in anger I thought it’d be better by now Lust and love are latent landmarks If I could leave them, just hope my car starts I’m losing contact with my context And life seems sacred only in past tense The present tense is pressing weaker As if somewhere back there there’s something sweeter These open doors are closing in The clarity cracks through the din The loneliness is setting in Is it a sin when we turn to our vices to burn it down again?
10.
I Don't Know What I Think I'm Doing but I Hope It Ends Well 05:25
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All you wanted I could never be But I could cause you trouble quite faithfully Still this break feels wrong ‘cause in your eyes I see The warmest home from which I’d ever want to flee I could show you if you’d only see That I could leave this life I you’d just let me Plunge me into darkness leave me be Because the candle of your love can’t set me free Forget me finally Forget me finally Got my tangled rope all tied up with yours And I brought my stress right up to your door I don’t know if I have enough in store Unless you expect less I’ll disappoint you more I’m on trouble waters and my minds at war And my sanity has surely washed ashore I’m a danger to myself and all my friends But I never thought this love would have to end I’m always late, I’m always listless, Always in need of forgiveness I’ll make you sad, I’ll make you miss this inclination to just exist I’ll waste your time and all my friends; I’ll fight with myself to the end The past and present brought me one wish To just learn to let go of some things Finally Forget me Finally Forget me Finally Forget me let me be Forget me Finally Just forget me Sometimes I dream I’d drive away Ride for miles nowhere to stay Pull the wheel and end my life it makes my stomach sick at night Chasing thoughts of razor blades getting crazier each day If you’re the cliff: I’m at the bottom too nervous to solve my problems I broke your heart but you broke mine first ‘cause you’ve seen me at my very worst Just when we get settled in then it will all happen again Pull away from all my friends but it’s harder that way in the end It’s all just a selfish fantasy Wish I could forget it Finally
11.
Princeton 05:58
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The moths are flying towards the light You’ve been dancing in their shadows through the night If you’re unsure what to do, don’t worry I see you I’ll lend my hand I’ll give you my advice I can’t believe the time you’ve wasted just to be With a manager who could never manage faithfully Now he’s got you down and the tide’s come up And the things you’ve done are eroding us This has come down to a simple thing. When it’s not about you it’s about him And the tears you’ll cry through your naïve eyes but you saw this coming And the way he steals the way you feel it’s a long time coming There must be a different way. Don’t you play dumb with me. I’ll read your texts, we’ll talk all night, you’ll waste my time You want pity for your sadness but you’ll never make it right How could you defend a coward who is hiding from the truth? He says “I’ll talk to you when I talk to you” But he was never there to leave you I don’t care if she’s a bitch he’s still her man and she’s alive You hoped for this all along and now you’ve crossed a line You can sleep with whom you like but I’ll tell you when you’re wrong and when I’m right The tears you’ll cry through your naïve eyes but you saw this coming And the way he steals the way you feel it’s a long time coming Don’t you lie I know you see. The truth is out, so who you gonna be? I never meant to hurt you; I only wanted you to see If it’s worth trusting him is it worth trusting me? What happened to the innocence that we once knew What was lies and what was truth?
12.
Shelter (interlude) 01:15
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13.
Braided 02:36
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How do you say goodbye to a friend When all you know is braided ‘til the end? Can’t forget or just pull a lever All mixed up and worse for the weather I had a second thought the other day I saw You’re doing better and that’s great Should everybody get right back together? All mixed up and worse for the weather It makes you question yourself And put your heart on a shelf You wonder “what did I say?” Either it’s wrong or it’s gray Another chance will not make it better All mixed up and worse for the weather ‘cause I remember every time that you cried Always drama ensued; It’s good times coupled with lies Maybe apart from the past is not a bad place to be Let’s face the truth you were a bad friend to me We were bad friends can’t you see? It’s not like before I don’t know how to talk to you anymore I know you can’t say goodbye to the truth I guess it’s just the past You’ve gotta lose It’s gonna hurt before it gets better All mixed up and worse for the weather It makes you question yourself You put your mind on a shelf You wonder “am I an ass?” Forget it all in the past We tried it over again It didn’t fit in the end Commit it to memory We’re braided eternally`
14.
Fence Sitter 05:13
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Ever since high school I been careening for this blinding life And I feel ten years older damn near every night Everybody round here’s shootin’ for the country or the city scene Somehow they think they’re better coming from in-between I don’t know my neighbors, and they don’t like me neither Half of my friends’ parents are divorced but mine are much worse off together Every yard has a fence, everything stops making sense I swear to god I forgot to dream. These nights keep passing without sleep I am well aware that this life ain’t just a dream, But this ain’t nothin’ like those nights we’re dreamin’ of And I am fine and well with living in the suburban scene But this ain’t nothin’ like those lives we been dreamin’ up I am mighty proud livin’ with the life I lead But this ain’t nothin’ like those dreams you been givin’ up Somewhere along the lines we all stopped hangin’ out Everybody started smokin’ and faded into the crowd Sitting round here getting drunk with all my friends As if a bottle of jack could tie up all of our loose ends Always watched more king of the hill than I ever felt like Family Matters All you get is a family tree and a status stick to measure You used to draw comics and play in bands, Now all of your dreams are lying at the bottom of some empty cans Anywhere else feels like the place to be, when you’re hangin’ around in bars like these I am well aware that this life ain’t just a dream, But this ain’t nothin’ like those nights we’re dreamin’ of I am mighty proud keepin’ all your company but this ain’t nothing like the lives we’re dreamin’ up So grab another drink and then pass one back to me cause this ain’t nothin like those, dreams I been giving up
15.
Outside (interlude) 00:45
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16.
Down Wind 04:35
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I smell a memory upon the breeze; it makes me feel like I am home If I could find it now I’d turn around, follow it back where it came from You have your friends to help you through the hard time when you’re only feeling low But times like these it seems to me you simply have to find yourself alone Jealousy ain’t worth a damn to me you see we all get second chances To get all that we want and probably there’ll be a couple more romances What we had was beautiful and I’ll always have a special place for you But I have to rely on myself now. It’s getting easier to do It’s growing with every year and now the truth is coming clear that All I’ve seen. And What I’ve done. We’ll see it all pass in time. It may seem that everybody’s found their happiness beyond your door. But you can’t live comparative, so stand with your own feet upon the floor. You’ll rush to find the finish line but all you’ll see is the familiar reality That you need some consistency; you cheat yourself by changing your life constantly How’s my life gone on so far? It feels like everything has come apart And there’s a sadness sinking in so deep I can’t tell where it ends and where I start The weight of your mistakes will drag you down unless you learn to let them go And it’s time you recognize that you’re not perfect but you’re better than you know It’s growing with every year and now the truth is coming clear that All I’ve felt, and all I’ve learned, we’ll see it all pass in time. When you get too aggravated You become the anger that you’ve hated When you’re complaining and you’re fighting It’s only yourself you’re stifling Its self-destructive Instigating, Can’t you see the time you’re wasting so If you don’t like the life you’re living, turn it into something different ‘Cause memories they seem so fleeting but present time is faster even and You and I will meet again sometime but not tonight…tonight
17.
Happiness Becomes the Norm 03:12
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I wanted to be wading into deeper waters but you always gotta check the coastI remember the moment, the clouds as they came The distance from everything as they took my reason all away Suddenly I felt like I was alone watching the new growth as they became decay Couldn’t tell you the reason, why things went astray My insecurities caught up with me just when I really thought I got away It chases me down again [x3] It chases me down And it always feels the same, it always feels the same It always feels the same, I hate it. But it always goes away, it always goes away It always goes away, I’m waiting Something is missing; I hope the bottom is close I don’t know whether this is heaven or hell but for me it’s a little bit of both I only want to understand the life I’m living but the future seems to be a ghost Motivations eroding, I started feeling alone When sanity becomes a fragile thing are you the parasite or are you the host?
18.
Still Life 02:44
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19.
Easy 03:05
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When I was young, time it slowly passed But when it was fun, well it never seemed to last Your friends our bikes and the convenience store Every crush a closed door but I was busy drawing pictures on the floor And I don’t know, nothing seems, special anymore Your sudden screams, the broken glass, and the toys across the floor It comes to me, in images, and faded memories It’s always been the simple things that make it easy The simple things they make it easy The simple things they make it easy To feel nostalgia, for the past forever gone Always closer to the end, I think I knew it all along These cops in my house, ask if I’m alright Christmas tree on its side, Drywall holes, but I nod as though it’s fine Get the hell out of my house, with your badge and your questions All my demons live here, so why don’t you just let them And I know, and I know, and I know, and I know That eventually you’d show I could have thought without a song, life could have left me all alone Pious in your views, but lovely eyes aglow Buried in your beliefs, but it ain’t above nor down below It’s a curve, it’s a kiss It’s the hand that holds the pain It’s a voice, it’s the truth It’s singing gonna keep me sane It’s the fall before the plea And it’s time I finally see It’s always been the simple things that make it easy The simple things they make it easy The simple things they make it easy The simple things they make it easy yeah And I knew it all along

about

This recording is a send off to my adolescence and a condolence for the awful truth I learned all through my childhood and young adulthood. I hope it means something to you
This album has been my baby, my burden, and my obsession for seven years; And while I can’t say it is perfect I Can Sincerely Say I’ve Tried

For those who don't appear in the credits:
Id like to thank my family: Steve, Mom, Katie, Mike, and Dad & JC. My extended family Frank and Frankie, Bobby & Donna & their boys, Margie, Nicole, Meghan, Scott and so many more.
My friends and peers: Ty Catello, Carrieve and Catia. Nick & Heather Oriold, Lia Yukna Julie Thiel, Nabiel, Tom, Krimmel, Mr & Mrs B, Brittany; my love, Pola and the crew @ Lower Forge, Ben Greenblatt, Axyl, Paul Bauer, Peg Leg Steve, Giselle, Brandon Newlove, Lennon Cantwell, Bikey, The Afloat guys, Deanna, Eggie, Eric, Jess, Josh, Dan Opella, Tunes, Chris & the Browns, Tyler and the rest of the neighborhood Kids, Allie, Lucy, Julia Connor, Bella, Dubin, Jordan Betze, Folklore, Cole, Ringel, Jess, and so many more people. Audacity & Paint.net - free ware saved me

credits

released November 10, 2023

All songs Written, Produced, & Performed by Jake Gussman except where noted
Mikayla Bandomer: violin tracks 3-5,10,13-19
Matt Montagano: drums: tracks 1 & 19.
Pat Oberstaedt: Bass: tracks 3,4,11,16,18,19
Trumpet: tracks 11 & 18: Production help: tracks 10,11,16
Max Bizerak: drums: tracks 4,7,8,14
Abbie Mylod Gallie: cello: track 13
Zack BirnBaum: drums and count off on the coda of track 10 (the fast part)
Rob Birnbohm: backup vocals track 4

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Jake Gussman Medford, New Jersey

My New Album: I Can Sincerely Say I've Tried has been in the works for my entire adult life and I really think you'll love it.
I tried so hard to tell the story of suburban youth and adolescence and tell it beautifully.
Album out Friday Nov 10th
Singles out now.
Princeton EP out now.
I hope you like it ... more

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